Snakes On A Plain Biscuit

You’ve seen the movie Snakes On A Plane, right? No, me neither. It is by all accounts a terrible film however, that only got made due to internet hype that never translated into ticket sales. A shoddy unprofessional effort, that somehow snagged Samuel L. Jackson so it had a professional, talented face to show to the world. This reminds me of the games industry, and its laughable attempts to convince governments and mainstream media that it mass produces valid art.

Me, you, and the fanboys

So, my first article for Critical Gamer attracted a fair amount of attention, both here and at N4G. It’s nice to be noticed – even by sociopathic nerds.

That doesn’t tell the whole story, though. First of all the majority of comments that referred to me directly were somewhat negative. Secondly, most of the comments on N4G didn’t refer to me and, to be honest, most of them didn’t even acknowledge the existence of my article. I had inadvertently set off a mini fanboy war between PS3 and 360 zealots, which seems to be even easier than I had suspected. I repeat the sentiment of my previous article: people are idiots.

Why we enjoy videogames

The point, I realised after I’d started typing this sentence, is that the fundamentals of how and why we enjoy gaming are much simpler than we may suspect. Staying with Red Dead Redemption for a moment; it’s a great story, some of the moral choices are interesting, and there are so many set objectives both big and small, it’ll take you dozens of hours to do everything. Not to mention the multiplayer modes. But come on; are you telling me you didn’t buy that game because you get to be a cowboy? Not at all? You get a horse and a lasso and everything!!

Bend over and take your pricing

To recap: if you complained about Modern Warfare 2′s pricing and paid so much as a single penny more than you usually would upon release, you’re stupid. If you complained about the PS3′s release price but still paid it, you’re stupid. If you’re complaining about the Xbox Live Gold price hikes but have already resigned yourself to paying them, you’re stupid. If none of this applies to you, don’t worry. I do not doubt for a second that I could find several examples in your purchase history that would emphatically prove to my satisfaction that you are stupid.

What gaming has forgotten

Notoriously, big budget games have been pathetically desperate to emulate movies this generation. The problem is that developers try to emulate the movie industry via their cut scenes (and sometimes incidental dialogue); forgetting the fact that the budgets put aside for casting, direction, scripting, and cinematic computer graphics will never allow them to compete with the best that cinema has to offer. Also forgetting, of course, that games are meant to be played rather than watched. Nonetheless, there have been titles that have taken advantage of gaming’s interactivity in interesting ways.

Console Gamer till I die?

The first thing I’d like to do in this article is shamelessly plug the recently launched CG forum, which you can find at www.soapboxgamers.co.uk or by clicking the ‘forum’ link at the top of the page. There is a reason; this was originally going to be a post in said forum, until I realised I had too much that I wanted to say (as is, unfortunately for those that know me, so often the case). The second thing I’d like to do here is mention what I originally said in the forum, which has led to this article. Sadly for me, telling you this will have the side effect of making you hate me. Are you ready?

I really liked Deus Ex: Invisible War.

Religion, Atheism & Videogames (Nihilistically Ever After)

If you consider yourself to be a follower of a religion, have you ever thought about how your gaming hobby might clash with the teachings of your prophet/s or god/s? If you’re an atheist, has it ever occurred to you that perhaps turning your back on all such belief systems has allowed you to sidestep a potential moral minefield when playing videogames?

Congo war minerals in your console: Here’s how to tell them ‘no more’.

Last week, I wrote an article regarding the connection between videogame consoles and computers, and the war in the Congo – more specifically, people’s reactions to an article in Kotaku on the subject. Now, I am able to offer you a chance to show that you care.

The value of gaming > the value of human lives

What would it take to make you think about the fact that your gaming hobby might be contributing to real world suffering? An anonymous claim that the factory workers who make your discs are criminally underpaid? Reports of iphone factory – style suicides? Or how about this one, which there is reason to believe may be true: That your gaming consoles contain minerals mined to fund the devastating Congo war?

Summer Gaming

As we move into the summer months the release of major games becomes a trickle, much like a water supply during a summer drought. It’s a phenomena that has been synonymous with gaming for years, as publishers put all their efforts into pushing their titles for the Christmas market.

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